Is what Thumper's father told him
Words can be uplifting, motivational, give hope, or lead to serious depression. This is common sense and I'm sure that I'm not telling you something that you don't already know. (In the event that you didn't know...I'm very sorry and if you like I will explain it all in extreme detail for you. Your poor, poor dear!) Having said that, it amazes me daily how often I hear people saying horrible things about a current love, an ex, baby's daddy, best friend, former friend...the list goes on and on. What baffles me the most is that it seems people just think that as soon as the sentence has escaped that you're going to forget it was ever said. If you don't want me to remember things that you have said about who or whatever you talked about for at least five minutes or more, why am I listening? Most importantly, why are you wasting your time and mine? Here are a few thoughts I've had to help get my point across!
I had a friend once that would talk so badly about one of our mutual friends whenever she wasn't around. (I'm not going into any more detail than that) It always shocked me how much she would hang out with this friend of ours and tell her how great she was when we were all together. I've now tried to distance myself from friends such as these cause let's be honest:
I had to include this for my besties!
If you make a point to tell everyone how terrible your ex was to you and you'll never get back together, don't expect us to forget all those terrible things when you decide to give this horrible person that 27th chance. If you paint the picture of an abusive ex, or someone who can't keep their pants on, who is constantly bumming off you...of course your friends (those people who DO care about you) are going to be anything but thrilled that you are back together. Again...this feels like common sense and yet I could name at least a handful of people that this covers.
But will most likely resume in a matter of days...
When you're mad and/or fighting with someone and you tell them that they're worthless, or a bad friend, or taking advantage of you, ect. and the statement that you made isn't true... Well, you just need to brace yourself for the nice wedge that you just placed between yourself and that person. You can try and justify what you said, claim you didn't mean it, it sounded worse than it actually is, it was spoken out of anger...whatever. I'm telling you now that when you say something to purposely hurt someone, it's going to stay with them. It can be forgiven but it isn't going to ever truly be forgotten. That thought, your tone, the expression you had on your face when you said it, it will creep up from time to time. Words mean things, and like a text message...once its out there, there isn't a way to get it back.
Gotta love HIMYM
Some of the best advice on this I found was from one Craig Ferguson. In his special that he taped in Nashville, (which is available to purchase or watch via Netflix) he posed three questions to ask yourself before you open your mouth to speak:
1.) Does this need to be said?
2.) Does this need to be said right now?
3.) Does this need to be said by me right now?
Always take a moment to think before you speak, and if you can't see a positive side in saying what's on the tip of your tongue...odds are it doesn't need to be said at all. Do you have a friend like this? Have I opened your eyes and you're realizing that you're like this? Tell me about it in the comments section. Have a great day readers!
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